There is something oddly satisfying about the need to break ties. I have avoided burning bridges for as long as I can remember because I used to truly believe that you need to be there for someone at their worst if you want to deserve them at their best. The truth is, I still stand by this. However, this doesn’t mean I will remain at their side when it proves detrimental to my health or when, for some reason, I’m not enough.
I can count to a number higher than one where I have done my best to support someone, listen to them, defend them, and cherish them, only to be spoken of behind my back—and not with pleasant words. It comes to that time that I wonder: If all I did was support them and do my best to be a friend… and this happened… then do they really deserve my friendship?
I’ve learned that it’s important to have standards in your relationships, not only romantic, but in your family and friends too. Don’t let people take advantage of you. Don’t let people disrespect you. Don’t let people put you down. It’s okay to have fights and misunderstandings, as long as you remain true to your standards.
When someone doesn’t meet your standards, you have two choices: you leave or you lower your standards. For years, I went with the latter option. I lowered my standards into the ground so I could remain with the people I cared about. I came up with excuses for them, defended their actions, and forgave them mistake after mistake after mistake. There came a point where I realized… I deserve better.
So now, when I come across a relationship that I know won’t last because they are falling below my standards, I am not afraid. They move on too. Very few times am I actually missed.
There is, however, nothing more satisfying than leaving someone behind knowing you didn’t necessarily leave them alone. They will be okay without me.